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From the Ashes I will Rise….

My entire life I have fought battles, from the day I was born, I was born a fighter. I was born with multiple birth defects and was immediately rushed from my mom and dad to Boston Children’s Hospital. Where they had to take care of me. It would be a week before my parents could hold me. I was born as a 4 week premature baby and the doctors were unsure of what kind of a life I would have. In those first few months of my life and in the first 2 years I had over ten operations. 

 

From the Ashes I will Rise…

It took me longer to learn to crawl and walk compared to most babies because every time I would get to that stage, I would have another operation and they would have to put long cuffs on my arms so I wouldn’t touch my face. However those cuffs, doing what they were designed to do, -limit my arm bending- would also limit my crawling progress.

 

From the Ashes I will Rise…
From the age of two to thirteen, I had one major operation just about every year. Each time was for something to help reconstruct my cleft lip and palette. One that I vividly remember, was when they took bone marrow from my hip and put it in my gums where the cleft had been to create bone to hold my tooth in place. The recovery from that was rough. Having the bone marrow from my hip took some time to get me walking normally again.

 

From the Ashes I will Rise…
During my early school years I was the loner, the kid who sat alone on the bus rides, the kid who sat alone at lunch, the kid who’s friends actually made fun of her to her face and undoubtedly behind her back, the kid that cried herself to sleep, So. Many. Nights. I was the kid that in all honesty, didn’t want to live. I was bullied for the way I looked, I was bullied for my bubbly personality, I was bullied for the sake of being bullied. I know what bullying feels like, I know HOW it makes you feel.

 

From the Ashes I will Rise…
High school was where my world started to shift. I decided that I would not be my old story any more. I would be proactive in my high school life and experience. I joined sports teams, clubs and the school plays. I became President of Peer Support and I was captain of two of my sports teams, senior year. I flourished in high school. But by my junior year my parents started going through one epic and messy divorce. Despite that, I found my stride and kept going. And then at the end of Senior year, what was the BEST four years of my life up to that point, that summer, my 20 year old bother died. And my world was shattered yet again.

 

From the Ashes I will Rise…
I delayed college for a year while I stayed home with my suicidal mother, and tried to be her comfort and her “Rock” all the while I was falling apart on the inside, burning up and spiraling.  After a year, I decided that I needed to get out of town and spread my wings to try to find myself again. I went to Georgia for college. Spent the next four years learning and growing, but honestly just going through the motions, not fully whole.

 

From the Ashes I will Rise…
After college I came back to NH and decided to try something I wanted to do my whole life. I wanted to do karate. So, I started! Over the next several years many ups and downs, would happen. Financially I was in a very rocky and scary place, and then my brother’s best friend died. He was someone that I truly loved. My heart shattered. I think I actually cried more at his funeral then I did at my own brothers. At this point in my life I had my martial arts family to lean on. I was teaching a lot and training a lot and this was my net, my comfort, my refuge and my life.

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From the Ashes I will Rise…
Over the last year, I had to leave my marital arts family, and this nearly destroyed me. My heart broke yet again. I lost sight of my dreams and I am not ashamed to say, I even lost hope. Lost sight of the purpose of being alive, a feeling I haven’t had since I lost my brother, But from the Ashes I will Rise So I decided to make my own dream.

 

From the Ashes I will Rise…
In August of 2019, Phoenix Fire Martial Arts was established. The name, was given to fit the philosophy- “Building strength through Perseverance” At this I am an expert, my life has demanded that of me. So now, I am learning to have my own voice, to follow my own vision and to teach others that it is ok to TAKE UP SPACE in YOUR LIFE!

 

FROM THE ASHES I WILL RISE:

Through Martial Arts and through Self-Protection I seek to encourage and empower each and EVERY ONE of my students to be bold, be confident and be who you are. Take up space and RISE!

 

So like the Phoenix who Rises from its own Ashes….. I WILL ALWAYS RISE.

 

Come Join My Journey and fuel your own Rise!!

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